When Carter was born, I was a nanny and he had constant attention from the girls.
By the time they went to school, Lydia was around for him to play with.
When it came time for them to start “school”, we were in a place that took children as early as 6 months old,
so they both went to “school” together.
When we moved here they were both old enough for the preschool program.
When they were in school, they were both in school.
When they were at home, they had a built in playmate.

But now there’s Asa…
A big boy in so many ways, but still a baby, too.
Old enough to know that he’s all alone,
but not old enough to go to our local preschool.
Constantly walking around calling for his big brother and sister,
It’s pitiful.
He misses them.
And while I love to read books and cuddle and play,
I can’t spend every single moment catering to his every whim.
(I did that yesterday and it didn’t go well for either of us…
especially once the big kids got home and he thought I was 100% his
and he had no interest in sharing HIS Mommy with anyone else.)

So we’re trying to strike a balance.
And we’ll get there, I know.
But I keep swinging from frustrated with him to sad for him.
I know he’s lonely, but he’s going to have to learn to entertain himself a little bit.

Right now, though?
One more book.
And then I really am going to work on cleaning out that closet!