Monthly Archives: August 2011

Ready. Set. Go?

Remember when I was all I-have-confidence-in-confidence-alone and I posted pictures of my legs on the internet?

Well, that same day I applied for a job.
It’s an online-work-from-home job, but it’s a real honest-to-goodness job.
And I would have to find childcare of some sort for at least a few times a week.
And while I do have mixed emotions about that, I think it would be good – for me and for them.
I love my children and I love being home with them…
But at the same time I think it would do us all some good if we had a little break from each other.

And then there’s also the I-don’t-feel-like-I-contribute-enough.
Which is silly because Marshall has never, ever (not even once) insinuated that I don’t contribute enough to our family.
(And I know that just being here and keeping things up and running is more than enough.)
But I feel like I could (and want to!) do more to help out financially around here.
And not that money is the end-all-be-all, but I think it would help me feel a little more accomplished.
(It sounds silly to even write that, but I know I’m not alone on this.)

So the job I applied for was a shoot-for-the-moon kinda thing.
I may not be the most qualified for it and they may have already dropped my application in the recycling bin.
But I did jump.
I did put myself out there.
And it lit a fire somewhere in my mind, in my heart.
(But it’s a small fire and I’m having a hard time seeing very far with such little light.)

So I’ve done a lot of praying.
And a lot of thinking.
And some more praying.
And reading.
And thinking some more.
And I have yet to come to any conclusions.
So what do you think?
What can you see me doing?

Nekkid is what makes happy.

This weekend we took a trip to the mountains.
We were supposed to go to the beach, but you know…there was a little something going on that kept us away.

I have so many pictures of our weekend away – camera and phone pictures –
But we don’t have reliable phone service up there, so I wasn’t able to upload much.

We picked flowers and made s’mores.
We went to our favorite antique mall.
We (well, the children) played in the creek in their birthday suits.
And Lydia gave us our big laugh of the weekend when she proclaimed:
“Nekkid is what makes happy.”

Here’s what you would have seen on Instagram or Facebook if I’d been able to post:

‘Real’ pictures to come tomorrow (I hope).

Wishes and Dreams

The morning light is flickering through the leaves,
filtering through the blinds and then finally…
softly dancing on your cheek.

And I know it’s time to wake you.

But this moment is so still that it seems frozen.
This for which I keep wishing
-for time to freeze –
has finally happened.

(But it won’t last long.)

And though it was my wish,
I am glad I will not get my way for long.
See, I want to freeze this moment…
but I also want today and tomorrow to come alive.

Instead of nudging you or calling your name,
I slip under the covers with you,
feeling the warmth of your skin on mine.
And you begin to stir, but settle yourself into the crooks of my body
that were seemingly made for you, a perfect fit.

I am constantly amazed at how you change, how you grow.
And yet somehow, you are never too big to fit in in my arms
(or my heart).

Hey Mama! {Music Review}

One of my favorite features of Spotify(a music streaming service for your computer and some mobile devices) is being able to hear what other people are listening to.  You can use your iTunes account and share your playlists with your Spotify friends.  (You can also search specific artists or songs and listen to just that.)  So here I am listening to everybody’s music and I run across the lovely Alli Worthington’s 2010-2011 playlist.  It included songs from some of my favorite artists.  And nestled in between those songs was “Hey Mama“, which I loved from the moment it first started playing.  Go ahead and click that link.  And then try not to dance.  No matter what we’re doing when it comes on, our house becomes a dance floor for 3 minutes.

So when One2One Network had the opportunity to review the whole album, Young Love, I snapped that up immediately!  Several of my friends were familiar with Mat and his music because he was at Blissdom this past year, but I was a little busy that weekend and missed out.  But I’m making up for lost time!  We have had this music on non-stop since I got it in the mail last week.  The music is fun and catchy and the lyrics aren’t just fluff.  “Count on Me” is full of brilliant play on words and it took listening to it several times and reading the lyrics before I finally caught it all.

It is not often that I can say this: I like every single song on this album.


And for those of you near me?  Guess what?  He’s going to be one of the first acts back in the Georgia Theatre!  I was SO excited when I found out about that, but I can’t go because we already have something big planned that night.

Tickets are only $17!  And I promise that you’ll see a fabulous show!  (Doors open at 8.  Mat starts at 10.)

Wanna know more about Mat and Young Love?
Run your mouse over the super cool widget below.
Or pop on over to iTunes and download the whole albumfor only $9.99.


I stand on the edge,
Peering into the cavern of greatness.
I want to jump;
To be swallowed whole by purpose,
To be cradled by the velvety arms of contentment.

But like a weed tangled around my ankles,
Fear holds on to me and won’t let me go.
Fear wraps around me so tightly that I can’t take in even




Fear whispers: you.aren’t.goodenough.
(and you never will be.)

But I will fight it. (And I will win.)
I sing loud enough to drown out fear.
I chant my hopes, my dreams, my prayers.
And although it seems as if I am shouting into big, dark nothingness…
I know, I know, that it is out there somewhere.
And that beyond what I can see with my strained eyes,
There is more. Yes, there is more.

I can hear the rush of excitement,
The sighs of the content.
And they call to my soul.
They cry out to my passion
And remind me that I am stronger than fear.

And so I hold my breath
and clench my fists

I jump.

Weekly Winners {A Day Late Edition}

I’m a day late and a dollar short, but I wanted to share these anyway.

Find more Weekly Winners over at the lovely Lotus’ blog.



Round and round and round we go.  Where we’ll stop, nobody knows.

Sweet, Sweet Baby

Let them eat cake.

Friday Night Lights

Little Cousins

Special Feet

I’ve written before about Carter’s “special feet“.  For some unknown reason, he was born with only 8 toes – the typical 5 toes on his left foot, but only 3 on the right.  It’s not something that bothers us, and honestly there are times that I completely forget about it.  Until…I have to go buy shoes.

His feet are obviously different sizes, the right being almost 2 and a half sizes smaller than the left.  And typically we have to purchase two pairs of shoes to make one “Carter pair”.  In the beginning, there were some companies who were gracious enough to work with us by giving us a discount on the second pair, but we once got a pair of hand-me-down Crocs and slipped them on as we ran out the door one day. (We were running late.  I know you’re shocked.)  And lo-and-behold…they stayed on both feet!  One pair of shoes fit both feet!  The right shoe was still slightly loose, but I’d learned from experience (a sad, sad experience which left me shoe-less on vacation) that Crocs shrink in the heat.  So I popped that shoe in the dryer for a few minutes and ta-da!  A pair of shoes that fit perfectly!

Another little issue he has is that the ankle bones did not form properly and his ankle doesn’t bend left and right like a normal ankle.  So if we suspect that he will be doing a lot of running, we try to use shoes that will stabilize the ankle.  We have been using regular old hightops, but I was delighted to see that Crocs how has a new school-approved line of shoes with 13 options, including a Hi Top sneaker!  (Although I doubt I’ll be able to shrink one of those…)

Today is PE day for Lydia.  Last week I forgot and she scolded me for not sending her in tennis shoes for PE day.  I have to admit that in all the school shopping, I’d completely forgotten about tennis shoes (because we live in flip flops and sandals until November).  So I had to rush off and get some for her this weekend.  (Carter’s still fit from last year.)  Did you include new clothes and/or shoes in your school shopping?

If you haven’t gotten new shoes, yet, check out this interactive Crocs video…


…and search for a little something near the end that may look a little like this:
Click on the hidden item and find a surprise for you from Crocs!

Thank you to Crocs for sponsoring this blog post. Please click here to learn more about Crocs’ new Back to School line.
I was selected for this sponsorship by the Clever Girls Collective. All opinions expressed here are my own.

I Spy

I spy with my grown-up eye, a grown-up world.
(I see limits and boundaries and red-tape.)

You spy with your child eye, a child’s world.
(You see possibility and to infinity and beyond.)

I spy something gray.
(Rejection. Hurt.)

You spy something yellow.
(Warm sunshine.)

I spy something red.
(Danger.  War.)

You spy something green.
(Pretty leaves.)

I spy something black.
(Unknown.  Fear.)

You spy something blue.
(Calm waters.)

Your child-eyes see much more clearly.
They haven’t yet lost their focus.

(I pray they never will.)

Sweet Baby Sneak Peek

I saw that the i{heart}faces challenge this week was eyes.
I have several pictures of eyes that I really love, but the idea is for you to use a current picture.
I didn’t have one, but I was doing Alden’s 6 month pictures (I’m only a little late) and ended up with this one.

Oh, sweet girl.  I love her to pieces.

And I hope to have the rest of her pictures done sometime soon!

The Yearn to Learn

My ‘big’ kids started school last week.
Carter in 1st grade.  (How does that all-of-a-sudden seem so grown-up?)
And Lydia in Kindergarten.  (She has the same teacher he had last year.)

I didn’t cry when they started.
I didn’t even tear up.
They were so excited.
(And I was so excited!)

But today as I pulled away, the tears finally found me.
But not for the same reasons of other firsts…
Not because I’m lamenting time passing,
Or because I miss them while they’re gone,
But because I was so completely overwhelmed in gratitude.

This morning on the way to school I heard them talking about the sun.
(They know so much; much more than I think I knew at their age.)
Carter told the others about the sun being made of fire and hydrogen.
And we talked about elements and the periodic table
And how hydrogen and carbon and oxogen link up and hold hands to make brand new things.
How elements are all different – like you and you and me and Daddy and Asa and Alden.
And they link up (just like we do when we cross the street) and then they make a brand new thing, a family.
“Mama!  We are just like elements!”

Yes, my loves, you are.
You are just like elements.
You are the building blocks of all that matters to me.

And we pulled up to school.
And they clamored out of the van.
And they linked up.
And ran into the school.

My little elements.
Thirsting for knowledge
And soaking up every.single.thing.

And I cried because I am grateful for them, their excitement for learning.
And I cried because I hope, I pray that I am teaching them well.