This week I’m doing a parenting series on things I wish someone had told me before I had kids. (It’s possible that someone did indeed tell me these things and I just wasn’t listening.) I do not claim to be a parenting expert (not even close), so take what I say with a grain of salt. Everything you see here is based on my experiences. Yours may be different…and if so, I’d love to hear about it!
Today I’ll be talking about the things that no one ever tells you about pregnancy, these things that you won’t find in the informative weekly prenatal newsletters you have delivered to your inbox. (I’ve touched on some these before, but it’s been a while.)
- Your girly bits will never be the same. (Go ahead and start preparing yourself now.)
- Neither will your boobs.
- You will
probablypee on yourself. Sometimes it’ll happen when you cough, other times it will just happen. - Buy a Bella Band (or something comparable).
- And a body pillow.
- Research but don’t obsess. About pregnancy symptoms. What carseat to buy. Cloth or disposable. Epidural or drug-free. Bottle or breast. Just make a decision and run with it.
- Be prepared to buy bigger shoes. My feet got fairly swollen during each pregnancy and grew and average of 1/2 size with each child.
- Follow the ‘rules’ if you want. But don’t feel like eating soft cheese or lunch meat will automatically hurt your baby. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I followed all the ‘rules’ with my first baby and he was born with 8 toes. I didn’t worry about the ‘rules’ with the other pregnancies and they were fine. That being said, use common sense!
- You will cry over the oddest things, get pissed off by things that normally make you happy, and periodically question your sanity. Pregnancy hormones are cuh-ray-zee, not you. Just stay aware of the fact that it’s the hormones and try not to freak out the people around you.
- Okay…well, maybe you are crazy. But it’s only temporary. And just being aware is half the battle. Find a friend who can listen and share your crazy with them. It makes it much easier to handle that way.
- If your symptoms don’t fit the books or don’t follow the timelines that you see online, don’t worry. Every pregnancy is different.
- You are the perfect size and so is your baby bump. Some people start showing when they are 10 weeks along and some people don’t show until well after 20 weeks. Some people look like they are about to pop when they are only 30 weeks and others get to delivery day looking like they’re only a few months along. Remember, every pregnancy is different.
What did I leave out? I’m sure there are tons of things that I’ve forgotten! What surprised you about pregnancy?
Don’t let people tell you that you will only be *this* size for a few months so don’t get a bunch of clothes that you won’t use. Truth-you don’t need a bunch of maternity clothes and you don’t need to buy anything brand new. With all of the thrift shops and consignment stores you are bound to be able to get what you need. I recommend getting stuff that can work after the baby is born as well and I am not just talking sweats. If you look good you will feel good and with all of the swirling hormones and emotions during pregnancy you will need all the extra peace of mind moments you can get.
For the one about make decisions and run with them–also be prepared for all your decisions to fly out the window. For example, I was pretty determined to have a waterbirth. A) The state in which I delivered does not allow midwives to practice outside of hospitals, and only one or two hospitals in the state have waterbirthing facilities. B)Your body may or may not operate the way in which you think. As I found out after delivery, I never could have had Baby Bear vaginally, and that is part of why he went into distress. So, be prepared to change plans.
Yes! If you have a birth plan, it should include “Be flexible.”
The terrible, debilitating constipation!! Take a stool softener from the moment you find out you are pregnant, especially if you are taking zofran for morning sickness. I thought I was going to end up in the hospital it was so bad! And that being said, morning sickness is not just for the morning.
Also be prepared for the medical staff to take extreme measures if you are constipated (ie, before being discharged from the hospital).
A c-section does not mean that you have failed in anyway. Breastfeeding is not always as easy as it looks. Stretch mark creams are a waste of money. Some people get them and some people don’t. It’s genetics not special creams.
Don’t be surprised when you knock things over with your newly protruding parts (breasts, butt, or belly, depending on where you carry pregnancy pounds).
Everything changes when you are pregnant. Your skin. Your hair. Your dreams. Man-O-Man, the pregnancy dreams! Doozies!
People (family, friends, and strangers) will hound you your entire pregnancy to find out what you plan on naming your baby. If you choose not to tell or in my case really hadn’t decided, plan on receiving dirty looks and comments. Also, no matter what you name your baby, there will be haters (the ones who either don’t like the name or think you should have used some family name). I love the name we picked, so hate on (if necessary).
Be prepared for friends and complete strangers to start asking you completely inappropriate questions. And to provide you lots and lots of advice you didn’t ask for.