Monthly Archives: January 2013

One Word At A Time

prayer-1-2

Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease
I beg like a child, in part because I know no other words.

For someone who loves to craft words, I often find myself stumbling over them as I pray.
No words seem full enough or big enough or small enough or just right.

And so I pause on repeat, not contemplating sentence structure or grammar or flow.
Not groping for synonyms, I give in to the repetition and just go.

I do it with please and thank you, but also with names and random words that pop into my mind.
Bible verses learned long ago nudge their way into my moments and I grab the word that is the brightest.
Or, honestly, the darkest…because sometimes it’s the darkness that draws me in.

It took me years to understand why someone would (or could!) meditate on one word.
It took me years to understand, but it seems to be taking me even longer to learn how.

I struggle to clear my mind, to focus on one specific thing.
Even when I sequester myself away from my family, I still hear their voices, their laughter and squeals, the sounds of life.
But I am even more easily distracted by the voices within, the ones that whisper and the ones that shout.

And so I chant.
One word at a time.

 

Two.

You turned two on Sunday and I suppose it shouldn’t have taken me by surprise, but it did.
After all the holidays and other birthdays, it just kinda slipped up on me.
We celebrated once on Saturday with my grandparents.
8418833906_747448d6ee_o

And again on Sunday with your grandparents.
photo (33)

Everything you got was pink and princessy, which fits you perfectly.
8421436732_566d05e808_o

I really must do better about using my real camera instead of just my phone.

I love the way you ‘talk’ non-stop, despite the fact that none of us have any idea what you’re talking about.
I love that you know what you want and go head-strong after it until you succeed.
(Well, most of the time I love it).

You love to sing “tee-uhl, tee-uhl, lee-uhl starrr” and you have those hard “r” sounds like Lydia did when she was your age.
The two of you are so similar in so many ways.  I hope that will bring you together when you are older and not push you apart.

You transitioned easily into the big girl bed, but still prefer your baby blanket to the sheets.
We all call you the baby, and I’m sure we always will, but you get less babyish every day.
It’s exciting to see you grow and change, but still sad to see the baby years slide by.

Since we’ve been homeschooling, you’ve gotten better about playing alone in your room.
When you play with the others, you but heads with Asa the most; usually because he is loving on you a little too much.
You really watch the older two carefully and copy every single thing they do.
They all adore you and are usually at your beck and call (or grunt and point, really).

I love to hear you say “eye yoo” for “I love you” and, oh! you give the sweetest kisses.
You squeeze your eyes up tight and lean in and usually giggle when you pull away.

You are constantly singing, especially when you are playing alone.
Daddy and I love to listen to you through the baby monitor.
None of the words make sense to us, but you just sound so happy.
And that makes me happy.

8258058225_5f440026bb_o

Eye yoo, my little princess!
Happy birthday and may God bless you with many, many more.

Love, Mommy

I’m write. Your wrong. (sic)

It’s nearly 10p.m. and my big kids just got into bed. Carter got a new telescope for his birthday and was excited about looking at the night sky (even if it really was too cloudy to see much at all). We meant to go out after dinner, but decided to wait for the little two to go to bed.  So by the time we made it outside, it was already past bed time and we spent more time outside than we meant to (or than my icicle toes would have liked). This is one of the perks of homeschool for us. If we had to be up and out the door by 7:45 in the morning, I never would have dreamed of letting them stay up so late on a school night. But we had a chance to study the sky while the little kids were in bed and while Daddy was home, so we took it.  (And maybe, just maybe, everyone will sleep a little later in the morning).

This kind of flexibility is one of the main things that I love about homeschool. Get done with a lesson quickly? Either move on to the next lesson or take a break. Struggling with a lesson and just not getting it? Take a break and we’ll come back to it later. See an opportunity on a Saturday that fits in with an upcoming lesson? Do it on Saturday and check it off then. A trip to the doctor/dentist/orthodontist? Ask questions and turn it into a real learning experience. Grocery shopping? Make sure you check the labels and do price comparisons. Reading, comprehension, math, problem solving. Have errands to run? Take your book with you and read in the car.

ReadingT_lowres-1

We are having such a great experience with homeschool that sometimes I want to do a little dance at the end of the day. While other parents are having to help their kid pound through spelling words again, rushing to get everything done before gymnastics or soccer or piano, I’m in the yard reading a book while the kids play. I have to admit that there are moments like those when I get a little smug about our choice. I think, “Ha! I sure am glad I’m not having to do homework like they are.” And low-and-behold I catch myself being a homeschool snob. It’s embarrassing, really. I know better than that. This homeschooling option is a good options for us for now. It may not be a good option for us for always and it isn’t the best option for many people ever. And that’s okay. Ultimately, I don’t care if you homeschool or if you don’t. I don’t care if you think I’m nuts or not. (If you think I’m nuts, chances are I give you plenty of opportunity to prove your point without adding homeschool to the mix). I don’t care if you ask me about what we learn or how our days go. I don’t care if you ask me details of testing and lesson plans and how we deal with the little kids while the big kids work. I usually don’t even mind if you ask me how I do it all. (I don’t have an answer for that, but I don’t mind if you ask). But I do get my panties in a wad when people try to take their preconceived notions about homeschool and try to fit them on my family like a too-tight pair of jeans. My kids are socialized just fine thankyouverymuch. They experience a wide variety of people and of beliefs and ideals and ideas. They learn the same things that they would be learning at a brick and mortar school. We don’t skip the stuff I don’t understand. (I just have to learn it with them). We don’t shelter them from the world (any more than I did when they were in public school). We don’t homeschool to keep them away from worldly influences. We aren’t bible beaters or have any plans to live in a commune with the other hippies or any thing like that. (Not that there’s anything wrong with being a super-fervent Christian or living in a commune, if that’s your thing). 

It just makes me sad to see the negative stigma so many people have about homeschool and homeschooled kids and homeschooling parents.  As a homeschooling parent, all I want is for you do to what is right for your family and for me to do what is right for my family. I want both of us to be able to see and appreciate that what works at my house may not work at your house. I want us to be able to celebrate our diversity, not hide behind it. I want us to play nice and not bicker about one way being better than another. I felt the same way when we talk about breastfeeding and co-sleeping and baby-wearing. Oh, Mommy Wars…I’m so weary. Let’s just drop the whole thing and hold hands instead, shall we?

One Hundred Days of Homeschool

Today is our 100th day of school! (Okay, I honestly have no clue how many days we’ve done school, because we often take off Fridays but we sometimes do school work on the weekend and I don’t really keep track of the days. But everyone else is celebrating and it seemed like something fun that the kids always liked and so we’re celebrating.)

The big kids wrote about what they’d do with $100.
photo (28)

We played a Race to 100 game.
photo (27)

They drew pictures of what they’d look like at 100 years old.
photo (32)

We made 100 piece snack.
photo (30)

We made a list of 100 things we love.
photo (31)

We picked up 100 (plus some) Legos.
photo (26)

And I gave them each 100 kisses!
photo (29)

We’re all still really loving homeschool and have decided to do it again next year.
I don’t know how long we’ll do it, but for now it fits and everyone is happy.
I’m not gonna mess with that!

 

Fun Forty-Eight

Remember those emails you used to get that asked you all those questions and you’d answer the questions and reply back to the person who sent it and also send it along to a few other folks to see if they were also procrastinators looking for an excuse to avoid real work also interesting people who like to answer silly questions just for fun? Well, my friend Emily did a blog edition one. And then so did Shireen. And probably a few other people who have nothing better to do are also procrastinators have really exciting lives.

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
I’m pretty sure the answer is no. I do know that I was originally supposed to be named Meredith, but my grandfather said he’d call me Mary (read: May-ree in Southernese) and my mom decided a new name was a better solution than trying to break that.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
When I looked at my little baby in a big girl bed.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
I like the way I type. Does that count?

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
I hate sandwiches. Like really hate them. But if I have to eat a sandwich, I like the rotisserie chicken one.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
Yep. A lot of ‘um.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Um…maybe. I can be pretty moody and overly chatty.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?
Naaaah.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Not any more! Thank goodness!

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
Not a chance in hades. Not even if you paid me.
Well…depends on how much you’d pay me.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
The granola crunch I make with cranberries and nuts

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
That question would imply that I actually wear shoes, much less shoes with laces.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
My name means strong, which is probably irony at its height.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Hold the ice cream and just give me the waffle cone.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
Their grammar.

15. RED OR PINK?
Red #godawgs

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
My arms. They look like sausages in most long sleeve shirts.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
My grandparents

18. WHAT IS THE TECHNIQUE THAT YOU NEED TO WORK ON THE MOST?
Subtlety? Patience? Timeliness?

19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Shoes are almost as overrated as pants. Who needs them?

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A french fry. Yep. Just one. But I’m about to eat more!

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
The sound of children playing in the yard, big trucks driving down the highway, the wind, and one lone bird calling.

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Big Dip O’Ruby Metallic, which is the same color (but not name) of the nail polish I usually use.

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Apple cider or “Christmas” smells

24. HOW IMPORTANT ARE YOUR POLITICAL VIEWS TO YOU?
Very, but I don’t talk politics often. Friendships are more important to me than politics.

25. MOUNTAIN HIDEAWAY OR BEACH HOUSE?
Mountain. You can’t get sand up your crack (as easily) in the mountains.

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
College football #godawgs

27. HAIR COLOR?
Auburn/Brown. Depends on how much time I spend in the sun.

28. EYE COLOR?
Brown

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
I used to before I had Lacik eye surgery

30. FAVORITE FOOD?
That’s a hard one. I like most food.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Heh. You said happy endings.

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Pitch Perfect, which was acca-awesome!
(That’s thanks to you, Shireen.)

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Black. (Shocking, I know.)

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Winter. You can add clothes all you want when you need to get warm. You can only get so nekkid.

35. FAVORITE DESSERT?
All Natural Hazelnut Ghiradelli Luxe Milk Chocolate, which would appear is no longer being made. ::sob::

36. STRENGTH TRAINING OR CARDIO?
Huh?

37. COMPUTER OR TELEVISION?
Both, please.

38. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
A Year of Biblical Womanhood by Rachel Held Evans, which is a fantastic and interesting read.

39. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
Absolutely nothing. It’s a generic (formerly) black mouse pad.

40. FAVORITE SOUND?
Laughter

41. FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC?
Is all an option? I’m partial to show tunes, folksy stuff, and classical.

42. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Europe. My grandmother took me when I turned 16.

43. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
I sing a little.

44. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Georgia

45. WHERE ARE YOU LIVING NOW?
Georgia

46. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HOUSE?
Brick

47. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR CAR?
Silver

48. DO YOU LIKE ANSWERING 48 QUESTIONS?
It took longer than I thought it would…which is typical, I suppose.
But yeah, it was kinda fun.

Wanna play along? Post and link back to me or just email your response the old school way. 🙂

Mulligan Morning

I needed a mulligan this morning.
Nothing particularly bad happened, but we were all off.
More milk spilled.
Cereal crushed under the table.
Socks missing.
Dirty diaper bag not quite tied up all the way before I tossed it out.

Despite it all, we were early getting out the door.
(If you know me, you are aware how miraculous that is.)
As we were about to load up the van, there was the usual madness of morning.
I went to grab my hat (because I certainly hadn’t fixed my hair).
My favorite sea turtle ball cap was hanging right beside my silly sock monkey hat.
I grabbed the gray ball cap and then thought, “Ya know what? This morning needs more sock monkey.”
(Really? What morning couldn’t use more sock monkey…but I digress.)

photo (25)

I got a few odd looks and a few smiles and a couple of comments.
I’m sure there were some folks thinking, “Oh, Bridget…”
But it made me smile and it made the children laugh.
And a silly sock monkey hat changed my morning from ho-hum to happy.
I consider that a win.
Mulligan granted.

And then there were none…

Another last first. Oof.
This time it’s the last first time one of my babies will sleep in a big kid bed.

big girl bed_web-1

And then it will be the last first time I drop someone off at preschool.
And the last first time I hold a little hand as we cross the parking lot.
And the last first time I sing “Edelweiss” to one of my children at bedtime.

Oof.
Oof.
Oof.

With Carter, the firsts were ohsovery exciting!
And we celebrated every!single!one!
Now some firsts slip right past me.
But some grasp me hard around the waist and squeeze, stealing every drop of air.
I acknowledge them with a little hat tip and maybe a tear or two,
So determined to remember the moment that I forget to celebrate every!single!one!

I selfishly want to keep the moments for my own, to not share them with anyone.
It doesn’t make sense, I know…but if I don’t tell anyone then it never happened, right?
Maybe, I think, I can even will time to pause, if only briefly.

photo (24)

There was no planning, no prepping this time.
I didn’t move the crib mattress to the floor for a little while so she could adjust.
I didn’t have a big talk with her about moving to a big girl bed.
I didn’t think about where I’d move which piece of furniture to make room.
I just snatched the bandaid off – fast and furious.

I saw her try to climb out of her crib onto the dresser top just yesterday.
Bed assembled this morning.
New mattress acquired this afternoon.
Bed linens washed this evening.
And a little (big) girl snoozing in bed tonight.

big girl bed_web-2

The biggest girl so proud to share “her” bed with the little one.
She helped me wipe it up and clean it off and put it together.
She helped me wash the sheets and pulled them warm from the dryer.
She helped me make the bed and carefully place the pillows.
And then she showed off her masterpiece.
The little one grinning beside the big one, my heart nearly popped open wide.

Through cuddles and laughs (and maybe a tear or two), we celebrated.
A baby no more.
It’s bittersweet.

eight wishes.

As you grow, I wish these things…

one.
that your passion for learning never fades,
that you never stop asking why,
and that you never stop trying to make the impossible possible.

two.
that your smile always stays genuine,
that you keep that sparkle in your eye,
and that you keep joy in your heart even when it’s hard to do.

three.
that you continue to show compassion to others,
that you keep asking how you can help,
and that you keep wearing your heart on your sleeve.

four.
that you will always be friends with your siblings,
that you will laugh with them and have fun together
and that you will love and protect and care for each other.

five.
that you will always be a good friend,
that you will know when to help and when to give space,
and that you will have friends who know how to do the same.

six.
that you will feel a connection with your Creator,
that you will ask hard questions and seek the answers,
and that you share what you’ve learned in a kind, loving, and gentle way.

seven.
that you will be brave and courageous,
that you will look for adventure (with a healthy dose of reason)
and that every now and then you close your eyes and leap.

eight.
that you will always be my little (big) boy,
that you will always know how much I love you,
and that you will always know that I am here.
Always.

8yrsold_web-1-3

Happy birthday, love!
May all your wishes come true.
Love, Mommy

 

The Climb

One foot, then the other.
A slip and a slide and a crash.
Determination.
Try it again.
One foot, then the other.
Forever and always it will be:
One foot, and then the other.
You can do it!
Try it again.

photo (23)

He called back to her:
Don’t come up here!
It’s too dangerous!
With not even a hint of baby in his voice.
Nothing here but big boy, brave and fierce.

photo (22)

But she would not be swayed.
One foot, then the other.
She babbled back at him.
With her baby words and her not-so-baby body.
Nothing here but growing girl, brave and fierce.

Toys Toys Toys

I feel very grinch-ish sometimes when I scream about the toys-toys-toys-TOYS and the noise-noise-noise-NOISE, but good LAWD my house gets loud and crazy sometimes! And I don’t mind a few toys out here and there, but if I can’t walk to the bathroom without hitting a Lego land mine? Well, I get pretty darn cranky. But with Christmas and 3 birthdays all within a month of each other, it gets pretty messy around here.

I tried to stay ahead of the curve and clear out a lot of stuff before Christmas. The kids helped me sort it all and they chose what to give to St. Nick. Then he took the toys to the North Pole where they were fixed up and shipped out to other boys and girls. (Bonus: Santa can bring gently used items to our house and no one questions it.) That helped, but there were still way too many toys.

And so after Christmas we pulled everything out. Every.single.thing. WHEW!  And we sorted every.single.thing. And not just dolls, blocks, cars; but American Girl dolls vs. Cabbage Patch Kids vs. other dolls, Hot Wheels vs. Cars cars vs. big toy cars. And then we started boxing up. All the toys for January, February, March, and April went on the floor. One big box for May, June, July, August. Another for September, October, November, December. If you wanted your Halloween bucket when it was time to trick-or-treat, you sure as hang better make sure your bucket was in the October box. Want to take a toy to the beach? You should probably put it in the May-August box.

toys toys toys_web-1

I did this when they were little (when there were less children and less toys). It worked really well when I did it but with the help of time and laziness and a few moves, all that organization went out the window. Will we keep this up? I hope so. I think it’s possible. I already have to do wardrobe season changes, what will one more box hurt? (I really hate changing out all of their clothes! Takes for-ever!)

How do you tame the Toy Monster?
Do you give away toys they don’t use any more?
Do you sell toys at consignment?
Or just deal with the explosion of toys?

Do you save any of their (or your) favorites?
I’ve saved some to have when my kids are older, but younger kids visit.
And for (maybe someday) grandchildren.
I love that both my parents and Marshall’s have our toys for our kids to use.