And then…and then…and then…

Every night I make my to do list for the next day.
Often bits of the day-not-yet-over’s list bleed onto tomorrow’s.
I have our days fairly well-structured.
There is wiggle room, of course.
(I’m a sucker for a playdate.)
(And cupcakes.)
Sometimes we do rearrange our day, but we usually stick to the general routine.
This follows this.
That follows this.
This follows that.
And so forth and so on…

But today my to do list is empty.
Sure, there are things to be done.
But none of them as important as what I’ll be doing.

It’s so rare that I get to spend one-on-one time with my children.
I try to make it a priority, but it’s hard.
So often I settle for two-on-one time.
They don’t seem to care.
(Or even notice, really).
(But I do).

Without the littles there, I can really listen to him without being tuned into the background noise.
Without the littles there, I can look into her eyes instead of scanning and counting “one-two-three……four”.
Without the littles there, I can focus on just the two of them, my “big kids”.

And so today I will.
I’ll go completely off script.
I’ll follow their lead.
I’ll listen (really listen) to them.
And let them show me their world.

*****

And y’all?  I did. And it was perfect and beautiful.
Their world is full and happy and wonderful and it left me on a cloud.
Thank God for kids.