Still Thanks Giving

When you become a parent, you’ll hear (probably multiple times):
“It’s not about you anymore.  It’s about the baaaaaby.”
I’ve said those words myself.   And there is so much truth in that statement.
(Much more than you can even begin to comprehend when you first hold that sweet, snuggly bundle of joy.)

You no longer get to sleep until you wake up.
Your eating schedule is based on someone else’s hunger instead of your own.
You plan your day around naps(but not your own).
And you spend more time washing more clothes than you ever imagined possible.
(How do such small creatures create so much more laundry??)

As a parent, no time is your own.
(I can’t even go to the bathroom alone anymore!)

Every moment of every day revolves not around you, but the little one(s).
And while sometimes their enthusiasm and joy of childhood can’t help but invigorate you,
Other times it wears you down…
Reminds you that you aren’t as youthful and enthusiastic as you used to be.

And as a stay-at-home-parent, it sometimes feels even more so.
When you don’t work out in the “real” world, it gets lonely.
It’s isolating.  It leaves you feeling disconnected and detached from “real” life.

When you don’t have a “real” job, you don’t have a “real” boss to tell you that you’re doing a good job.
There’s no one to pat you on the back when things go well.
(But on the other hand, kids are probably much more forgiving when things go wrong.)

But when your job is to hug and snuggle and color and kiss,
It’s easy to get buried under all the hugging and snuggling and coloring and kisses.
Somehow after doing all the fun stuff and chores and necessities of life, it’s easy to loose you.

And sometimes I just want to be selfish.
Sometimes I just want to do what I want to do.
And sometimes I just want to shout:  Me!  Me!  Look at me!!

Sometimes I want to hear that people notice when I do something non-child related.
It makes me smile when someone compliments my writing or my photography.
I love to hear people oohing and ahhing over my crafts.
I really appreciate it when someone notices something that I’ve done.

And if that makes me selfish, then so be it.

But it also makes me aware that I need to applaud other parents for the great things they do.
It’s my job as a friend to encourage others.
It’s my responsibility to pat the back of those who might otherwise do things that go unnoticed.

So who can I encourage today?
Who do I know that needs a little note in their email inbox(or even their snail mail box)?
Who do I know that needs a smile or a hug or a little pick-me-up?

I’ll start by thanking each of you…yes, you!
In the past few weeks I’ve gotten 4 emails saying nice things about my blog, my pictures.
And I’ll be honest:  I printed those out and tucked them away in the “love box” that I have stashed away for rainy days.
We all need a high five every now and then.

And what about you??

Who inspires you to be a better person?
Have you told them that?

Who is always there for others, willing to help anytime (s)he’s asked?
Have you ever thanked them for being so giving?  So loving?

Even though Thanksgiving is over, won’t you help me continue the theme of thankfulness?

7 Responses to Still Thanks Giving
  1. domestic extraordinaire
    November 27, 2010 | 6:55 pm

    Yes!!

    It’s okay to be selfish sometimes, if you lose yourself you are no good to your kiddos.

  2. Aleasha
    November 27, 2010 | 9:58 pm

    Bridget, you inspire me. Honestly. Your writing is fabulous. You are a fantastic mother. And your craft skills are wicked awesome! It seems like you write exactly what I am thinking the day I’m thinking it. So if you are somehow getting inside my head… well, keep doing it cause at least one of us is writing it down! Thanks again!

    ps… i made your clock and finger painting ideas for christmas this year. I can’t wait to give them away!!!

  3. Gramama
    November 27, 2010 | 11:03 pm

    I loved you before you were a mother. I love you more today than ever before. I love you when you don’t do anything right. I love you when you do everything right. I am amazed at your cooking skills. You have certainly surpassed me in that category! Actually, you sing better than I do and do just about everything better than I do. That what makes me SO proud to call you MY daughter.

  4. Donyale
    November 28, 2010 | 7:50 pm

    I have a love box, but I call it a “sunshine box” and I’ve had it since high school. I had a person tell me that I would need reminding of how great I was a certain points in life, which at the time seemed self-centered. However, that box has picked me up more times than the people who wrote the notes that are in it could have ever imagined. I’m so glad to hear that someone else has something like it too. PLUS, it’s a lot cheaper than therapy.

  5. monica
    November 29, 2010 | 12:43 am

    i have a “happy box” that my previous shrink suggested. i actually created it during the sad and lonely infertility days, but i’m thinking i should dig it out and open it up again every now and then. you’re so right with this post. i’ve got a few posts in my drafts about how motherhood has redefined “me.” it’s just so hard to articulate, you know?

    you are a fabulous mom. but you are also so much more. you’re a thoughtful friend, a mad-talented woman and an incredibly generous mentor for our church’s youth. that, my dear, makes you an inspiration!

  6. punkinmama
    November 29, 2010 | 3:30 pm

    Love this post and really love the idea of a “love box”. I’m so glad I “found you” out here on the internet – you are an amazing woman and friend – and some day, I hope to get to meet you in real life!